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Daily Journey

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Sometimes Heart Ache Comes In Strange Ways

Being a mom is the hardest job I have ever ever been given in my life. I must say that I'm very honored that God saw fit to bless me with three wonderful beautiful daughters.
That He thought I was more than able to be their mom and the best one for them. I thank Him everyday for this blessing in my life.
As a result He also gave me the opportunity and blessing to be a grandmother to the ten most awesome and beautiful  grandchildren ever! That my beautiful daughters blessed me with as well. Which is even a higher Honor in my book! Too think God thought that I was even worthy to be blessed in such a way. He has truly graced me beyond my wildest dreams.
But as I said in the start of this blog being a mom is the hardest job I have ever had. When they were small, I could always figure out what the needed. I always seemed to know when they needed a hug and kiss. When to hold and cuddle them and take their pain away. I knew how to make sure all of their basic needs where meet. Loving them was so easy! They were like little dolls, that I had been given to love hold and cherish.
But as the years went on and they grew into beautiful young women. No longer those beautiful little porcelain dolls but young women that where growing into what God had created them to be. More beautiful then words can express... That's when this job became hard.
As the years past and I had to give them to the world to become who God created them to be. I thought my very heart would break into a million pieces. But I knew that God would always be with them and hold them and guide them.
The heart ache came in so many ways. From watching them get their hearts broken from the boy who didn't receive their gift of friendship or the first love. From the first kiss to the broken heart of the failed marriage.
Then they become wife's and moms. I was so proud! I knew that they where going to understand the love and blessing that I was given in them. That their hearts would be so full that they would not be able to understand how one could hold it all. But as the years would pass they would understand that love because that is the love God gives us all everyday.
It is what we as moms so easily do for our precious children daily, just as the Lord does for us.
The heart ache we must cause Him! Oh the heart ache I feel when my daughters hurt and I cannot do anything but stand in pray and beg my Father in heaven to hold them tight and take the pain and guide them into the place of love grace and peace. 
My heart aches in strange painful ways that I cannot even express. I often wonder is that what our Father in heaven fills when we are hurting and lost and feeling alone; when we don't reach out for Him. How He must hurt as I do when we can do nothing but sit back and wait for them. Just as He does us. The heart ache! The waiting! Oh how it hurts so! We just say please just reach out. I can so hear our Father in heaven saying those very words: "I'm here just reach out my child I'm here for you."
Sometimes the heart ache comes in such strange ways through listening to their voices without them ever saying really anything. The tone the quietness the stillness in the phone call. My heart starts to ache and I just know I must go to that pray closet and pray.
I know I cannot be there for them. As when they where small and I could wash that tear drop from their eye and kiss that boo boo away. I so many times wish they where those small  little dolls that I could make everything in their world okay once again. But.... now I must wait and wait and wait! I must lean upon my God in heaven my Father to help me to pray and to hold unto Him.

Lord I thank you for these gifts my beautiful daughters. I know you care for them more than I. As they were first loved by you. I thank you Lord for giving me these daughters to love, hold and cherish, and to raise. To help bring them up into the women of God you have created them to be. I thank you that you know every thing that they will ever need. You will know every heart ache and pain that they will suffer Lord. That you will be there to wipe every tear and ease their pain Lord.  That you will rejoice when they rejoice and laugh when they laugh. That you alone will guide them and direct them into the way in which you would have them to go Lord. I thank you that you hold them in the very palm of you hand Lord. That you have that hedge of protection encamped about them Lord. That you have given them wisdom and instruction and guidance. That you send those perfect laborers across their path to help up hold them and under gird them in all things Lord. I thank you for your perfect peace that surrounds them and surpasses all understanding Lord. I thank you that you have given them favor Lord with man and the kings and queens of this world Lord. That everything that they set their hands to shall prosper Lord and that they will not lack or go without Father. I thank you that no weapons formed against them should ever prosper Lord. I thank you for these daughters Lord and that you know my heart and my prayers for each one and their very different needs.  Thank you for their children and the blessing of being their grandmother Lord. I thank you that you are watching over them as you do their parents and me Lord. I thank you for giving  me peace in the heart ache and pain that I don't understand but you do Lord. I thank you for the VICTORY in their lives in every area Lord as they go through each day. May they always look up to you and reach for the heavens where their heavenly Father is first loved them. I thank you that they would only have ears to hear your voice Lord and that they would always heed to that voice in Jesus name. I thank you for working all things out for your good and your glory in Jesus name Amen

What helps you when your heart aches?

1 comment:

Thisisme. said...

What a beautiful post, and such a lovely photo of your three adorable girls when they were young. I, too, have been blessed with two beautiful daughters and three wonderful, healthy grandchildren, and I give thanks to the Lord every day. Blessings.